Funnies

~ Ancient Egyptians slept on pillows made of stone. That's actually what
caused many of their deaths...pillow fights.
~ Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many
people a company can operate without.
~ Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk
and talk. Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and be quiet.
~ Computer message I'd like to see: Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.
~ DIAPER spelled backward is REPAID. Think about it...
~ Do you find it strange that lemon juice is made with artificial flavor but
dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?
~ Frequent naps prevent old age, especially if taken while driving.
~ Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and get rid
of him for the day!
~ God only gives us what we can handle, but sometimes I wish he didn't trust
me so much!
~ Have a great day...unless you have other plans.
~ I can see how astronomers figure out the distance of the stars and their
size and temperatures and all that. What really gets me is how they find out
what their names are!
~ I may look busy, but I'm just confused.
~ If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one.
~ In Florida they use alligators to make handbags. Isn't it wonderful what
they can train animals to do these days?
~ So when someone indicates they've attached something to an email and
forgot to do so, do they have an attachment disorder?
~ The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are
born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
~ When people complain that they don't get what they deserve, they don't
know how fortunate they are.
PASS IT ON!
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